Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Long time, no see

Wow, it's been a long time since I blogged anything. I need to get back to it, I've got some stuff rattling around in my head that I need to get out and blogging helps a lot. I have the number of a grief counselor I need to call but I haven't been able to make my self make that call just quite yet. I got a note from the counselor at my kids school with the number so I know I need to call because now it's not just me it's affecting my kids.

I have a cousin, I'll call him M, who's wife died of a suspected aneurysm when their kids were young. Younger than my kids were when their dad died. My cousin had two boys and although they have grown in to nice young men they both have serious issues that I feel go back to the loss of their mom. One is off and on drugs, probably more on than we know and the other was just lost for a lot of years. :( Another cousin remarked to me after my husband died how she wishes M would have taken his boys to counselling after their mom died. It was like a light bulb went off and I realized I don't want my kids to turn out like his kids.

BUT, that is easier said than done. I've found the human mind has a remarkable ability to shut off when painful stuff happens. I don't think any of us have fully dealt with the loss yet. I don't know if I'm ready to deal with it yet.

And in my next post, I'll introduce you to the newest love of our lives around here. (As soon as I figure out which one of our computers the picture is on.)