Tomorrow is Wes's 39th birthday. I think this will be worse than my 39th birthday that was a few weeks ago. I had been thinking earlier this year about how next year we would both be turning 40 and I was already planning in my head how we would have a big cookout and celebrate our birthdays with our friends and family.
I just can't believe that we won't have that together. Instead I went to town today and ordered our headstone for the cemetery. Happy Birthday honey, I got you a headstone!
I guess it's for me too since it will have my name on it as well. That is something that I kind of struggled with. I'm 39. Do I really want to go ahead and buy my headstone? But then again, I can't even imagine putting one up for him with out me being with him, too. We've been together over half our lives, it would seem like a huge betrayal to him to put up a single stone. It's always been Kim & Wes. Wes & Kim. I couldn't leave him out there alone. No way.
3 comments:
Each of us has to make our own decisions on this issue (whether or not to put our name on the headstone). My sister's kids (ages 17 to 29 at the time) begged her to NOT put her name on the stone -- the sudden loss of their father was practically unbearable, and they did not want to see HER name on there as well. So she went with their suggestion. But when defined as you did -- you had been together over half of your lives -- I can understand your decision.
My husband's birthday was the 20th of this month. And our 25th wedding anniversary would have been towards the end of October. I turned 60 just months after his death, one of the loneliest birthdays I have ever marked -- even tho' I spent it with friends. That whole year of "firsts" is just so tough to go through. Someone who has not been widowed just cannot "get" it. I have no idea how many Christmas cards I did NOT write that year, and I frankly did not, and still do not CARE.
Hugs to you, Kim.
Thank you, Jessica. Your comments are really a help and comfort to me.
{{HUGS}} just for no special reason. I know it is lonely out there...
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